MEN'S & WOMEN'S PROBUS CLUBS OF WOODSTOCK-OXFORD

The program committee has been busy lining up an impressive list of speakers for the remainder of the Probus year. Here is what we have to look forward to.

May 17, 2023:

Barbara Dickson is an award-winning best-selling author, historian, public speaker,

documentary film producer and writer. Over eighty years ago, the Canadian government built a top-secret munitions factory called GECO – General Engineering Company (Canada) Limited. In her presentation, Barbara delivers a dramatic, personal, and detailed review of GECO and shares with audiences the incredible contribution made by so many women so long ago.

 1. When one door closes and another door opens, you are probably in prison. 

2. To me, "drink responsibly" means don't spill it. 

3. Age 60 might be the new 40, but 9:00 pm is the new midnight. 

4. It's the start of a brand new day, and I'm off like a herd of turtles. 

5. The older I get, the earlier it gets late. 

6. When I say, "The other day," I could be referring to any time between yesterday  and 15 years ago. 

7. I remember being able to get up without making sound effects.

 8. I had my patience tested. I'm negative. 

9. Remember, if you lose a sock in the dryer, it comes back as a Tupperware lid that  doesn't fit any of your containers.

 10. If you're sitting in public and a stranger takes the seat next to you, just stare  straight ahead and say, "Did you bring the money?" 1

11. When you ask me what I am doing today, and I say "nothing," it does not mean I  am free. It means I am doing nothing. 

12. I finally got eight hours of sleep. It took me three days, but whatever. 

13. I run like the winded. 1

4. I hate when a couple argues in public, and I missed the beginning and don't know  whose side I'm on. 1

5. When someone asks what I did over the weekend, I squint and ask, "Why, what  did you hear?" 

16. When you do squats, are your knees supposed to sound like a goat chewing on an  aluminum can stuffed with celery?

17. I don't mean to interrupt people. I just randomly remember things and get really  excited.

 18. When I ask for directions, please don't use words like "east or west or north or  south  

19. Don't bother walking a mile in my shoes. That would be boring. Spend 30  seconds in my head. That'll freak you right out. 

20. Sometimes, someone unexpected comes into your life out of nowhere, makes  your heart race, and changes you forever. We call those people cops.

 21. My luck is like a bald guy who just won a comb.